and you said cock pushups were impossible
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
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