Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
