I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I'm getting married
To pizza
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
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