he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
I'm just crazy horny about you
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
