You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
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