seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
