it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
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