I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Randomize
