'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize