There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Randomize
