Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Randomize
