dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize