You're my little dorito
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
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