I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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