I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
Randomize
