He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
