So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
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