I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
You need a sexual gate keeper
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Randomize
