Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
