At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Me too!
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Randomize
