Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
