Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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