my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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