Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
My vagina just recognized that song.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
Randomize