It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Randomize