Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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