Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Randomize
