TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
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