I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
