You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Randomize
