Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Randomize
