So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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