so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I need a beard to bite.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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