UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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