What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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