you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
