Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
