you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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