if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Randomize