I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
