Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Randomize
