never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I have surprise drugs for everyone
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
