this boner is exhausting
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
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