If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Randomize
