well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
