..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
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