honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Randomize
