sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
Randomize
