so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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