So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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